Thank you
by rachelberrys
Summary: Rachel wants to thank Will for being her mentor but when they start discussing feelings things get complicated.
1. Chapter 1

**I own nothing. I have the first few chapters written. Enjoy.**

She thought about everything he's done for her. He thought about how he was always her biggest fan. He thought about the lessons he's taught her. He's been more than a teacher to her. He's helped her through decisions and through troubles. He made her feel good even if sometimes she felt like he didn't respect or appreciate her musical abilities. It didn't matter to her that sometimes he gave away the solos she rightfully deserved. She didn't care that sometimes he was tougher on her. She knew it was because he believed in her.

All these thoughts ran through her head while she was walking down the hallway to the music room. She thought about how this may be the last time she walked this hall. She thought of how many times she was slushied in this hall. She thought about all the times she had a song stuck in her head and she knew that 20 steps away she could belt out the lyrics in front of others who appreciated music almost as much as she did. Almost. And she thought about the man who made it all possible.

Glee club wouldn't be glee club if it weren't for Will. It never would have gotten off the ground. Before Will took over glee club it was a pathetic group of people who didn't feel anything. There was no lesson each week, there was no emotional background to each lesson and there was no feeling of acceptance. Before Will took over glee it was all about technically learning how to sing, it was about learning the Broadway songs that were more than over done and no one cared about. No one wanted to hear the same boring rendition of a song over and over again.

But Will changed that. When he took over glee it became more about emotions. The club learned how to feel through music. They learned how to apply lyrics to they lives and how to share with others their experiences and express themselves. They learned what music can mean to people, not just how to hit a note. Rachel made friends, people with whom she felt comfortable. People she can honestly say she loved. She found her husband.

She couldn't really find a way to thank her teacher, mentor and friend but she found a simple way which might suffice. Maybe.

She knocked on the door to his office and he looked up, they met with a smile. "Rachel, hi."

"Hey," she walked into his office, "so I got you a little gift. I mean, I know it's not much but after daddies payed for the wedding we're a little tight on money." She extended her hand which held a bag and Will met her hand in the air to receive said bag.

"Rachel, you really didn't have to get me anything." He looked at her and then looked down at the bag and began picking out the tissue paper. He found a mug. A red mug with golden stars on it. "Rachel," he smiled largely, "this is great."

"I know it's not much, and you've done so much for me but I thought-" Rachel was cut off.

"I love it."

"I thought it would remind you of me for years to come even when I'm not here, it's supposed to remind you of the star you're helping me become and even if I never made it big you'll know that you helped me shine, anyway."

"I didn't get you anything." Will said, almost as if he was disappointed in himself.

"You didn't need to get me anything, there's no reason for you to have gotten me anything. You have dozens of students a year, maybe even hundreds and you shouldn't feel any sort of responsibility to get me anything."

"You're not just a student, though, Rachel."

Rachel smiled and tucked her hair behind her ears. She really valued the relationship they had and it was making her sad that while, sure, they may keep in contact he won't be her teacher in more. He won't be there to give her advice and support at any moment she desires it. She was beyond excited for her future but she hated that she had to leave her past in her past for the most part.

She knew that he'd always been in her heart and vice versa.

"I actually wanted to talk to you, Rach," he stood up and then sat back down, he knew he looked like a fool but he wasn't sure how to be in this moment, "as of the end of the day, you won't be a student here anymore. I won't be your teacher and you won't be my student."

"I know Mr. Schue, I'll miss you."

"Yeah," he took a deep breath, "but I don't want to miss you." He could feel the words coming out of his mouth in a nonsensical way. He didn't really go over this in his head, he knew what he wanted to say but he never considered how to say it. Her reactions or what to expect was never something he considered.

"We'll email, or if you have facebook you can add me. I know that's a little weird but I think it's okay. Also I have a twitter GoldenRBerry, Finn thought of it for me. He suggested it as a way to get in touch with my fans... you know, when I have fans." She was playing with her wedding ring. It had become a habit over the past few weeks.

He stood up and went to the other side of his desk so he could lean against it. He was closer to Rachel now she had gradually moved in further towards his desk from the doorway.

Will licked his lips before he spoke "When you had a crush on me, what did you feel?"

She stuttered a bit. She had no clue where he was going with this. "I-I don't remember. I guess I felt like you were important to me and I...felt like I wanted to be around you."

"And what do you feel now?"

"I don't understand what you're asking me, Mr. Schue."

"I'm just asking you what you feel for me in this moment."

"I don't know." She shook her head, she was confused and she definitely didn't know what his point was. She looked at the clock and saw that it was basically the end of the day and her dad would be picking her up any minute. "Mr. Schue, I have to go. Enjoy the mug, okay? I'll talk to you at some point. Thank you, though, for being there for me. I mean it." She walked over to him and gave him and hug. A firm hug full of love for what he's done for her, and then she quickly turned to the door and left.

Why was he asking her that? What was it that he wanted from her. She was flustered and confused. She stopped in the hallway and turned around, walked a few steps and turned around again. She didn't know where she was going but she found herself in the bathroom with a text from her dad: RUNNING LATE – WILL BE THERE IN 15.

She texted back without even thinking about it: ILL WALK – FINISHING UP BUSINIESS

She looked herself in the mirror and asked her what her plan was. Why was she staying? What was keeping her from going home, going to see her husband. She was married. It's not like she was going to make a move on Will or be okay with anything she thought he may do.

But it's not even like she had an ideas about what he wanted. He could have just been asking questions. Just "since we're parting – let's be honest" questions. Would she look foolish if she went and talked to him? What did he want?

What did she want?

She was standing outside the choir room, something was stopping her from going in, she wanted to but she couldn't. Her only problem was confusion. She didn't know what was happening and she didn't know why she didn't know. "You're overreacting." she said to herself. A soft inhale and she walked back to his office.


	2. It doesn't matter

"Rachel, I thought you had to go?" He stood up to greet her.

"Why did you ask me what I was feeling?" Did she want eye contact? Maybe not. But she had it. She had a whole lot of it but it didn't feel uncomfortable. It felt safe. She knew her thought process was a cliché but she couldn't help it.

"I don't know," he trailed off. What was he thinking? She's 18. He's obviously not. She's married and he's engaged. "But I didn't want to say goodbye to you.. without discussing things."

"So it's just tying up loose ends?" She was a little disappointed but she tried not to show it.

"No," he took a deep breath and ran his hand through his hair. "Rachel if I told you I cared about you, would I be crossing a line?"

"No. I care about you, too."

"If I told you I cared about you and I like spending time with you, would that be crossing a line?"

"No." She sat down on the chair in front of his desk.

"If I told you I cared about you, like spending time with you and feel attracted to you, would I be crossing a line?"

"You're engaged."

"That's not...what I asked." He wasn't frustrated but he felt as thought he was losing hope.

"I'm married." She was nervous. Mostly because she felt feelings she shouldn't be feeling and she didn't know if he was going to ask her about those feelings.

"I know, and I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"I am … attracted to you, Rachel."

She looked down towards her hands in her lap, resting on top of her very short skirt. She fiddled with her wedding ring and felt her face warm. She didn't speak.

"I'm sorry if that makes you uncomfortable."

What was probably only 5 seconds of silence felt like 5 minutes of silence.

"It doesn't." She responded. "I mean, I-I don't know how it makes me feel, but it doesn't make me feel uncomfortable." She needed a second to think about what was happening. It's not like she didn't have feelings for him. If she said that, it would be a lie. But she could never act on his or her feelings. She was married to Finn. Finn didn't deserve this. They made a commitment and she was going to stick to it. Or she wanted to. Or she knew she should. Or she knew she was going to make the wrong choice. Or something. "I never feel uncomfortable around you."

Her comment made him smile in this tense moment and he was thankful for it.

She was looking down until he spoke, "Rachel, how do you feel right now?"

She cleared her throat and looked up, and then around, and then at him. "I feel like I shouldn't feel the way I do."

"Okay.. how do you feel about me?"

Everything in the room was tense and awkward. There's a difference between awkward and uncomfortable.

"I feel..." A knock on the door stopped her in the middle of her sentence.

"Emma," Will said and she walked over to give her fiance a kiss on the lips. 'I thought you were leaving early?"

"Well I was talking to Principal Figgins and we were just talking about a renovation to my office for next year, the paint's beginning to peal and I just thought I should bring it up. Hi Rachel."

"Hi, Ms. Pillsbury." Now Rachel felt uncomfortable.

"Well, I'll let you two finish up, I just wanted to tell you that I was still here but I'm heading home now, so I'll see you at home, Will."

"Y-yup.. bye Emma." She left Will and Rachel alone again and Rachel fiddled.

"I'm sorry, Rachel." She looked up, not as if she was holding back tears, but not with a relaxed face. She was flustered and confused.

"That's why it doesn't matter how I feel, Mr. Schue." She stood up and headed for the door.

"Wait, Rach, don't...don't leave." He walked towards her.

They stood only inches apart, but not intimately. She was a little upset and he felt a little guilty and the atmosphere wasn't joyful at the moment and they both sensed it.

"Let me take you for coffee tomorrow. One hour. That's all I want."

She was going to think, but she didn't leave herself enough time. She answered almost immediately.

"Okay."

"Joe's? Noon?"

"Okay." She nodded and turned to leave.

"Think about what you want." He shouted softly out to her as she walked away.

When she woke up the next morning with Finn by her side she felt sick to her stomach. She loved Finn. Why would she want to hurt him? She didn't want to hurt him but she also didn't know what she wanted. She ran her hand along his arm. He wasn't waking up and she didn't think it mattered. It was only 9 but she figured it was time for her to get into her bath. Joe's was barely a 10 minute walk away but she wanted to be ready on time and there on time.

Her morning bath made her relax. There was something about the bubbles and the scents and the jets and the calming lights and the silence. After only a few minutes Finn walked in almost as loud as she thought he possibly could. "Hey babe." he walked over to the toilet to relieve himself.

"Finn, I'm in the bath."

"Yeah, I know, I'm just going pee."

She took a deep breath, "I expect you to respect my peace, Finn, it's not like it's news to you that I enjoy my morning baths."

"Whoa, settle down," he flushed the toilet and put his hands in the air, "I'm done."

Once he left she sunk down into the tub. Down as far as she could. Down into her heart. Down into how she felt. Under water she smirked to herself before splashing out of the water with force. The instant rush of cool air felt good after being submerged in the hot water and she knew it was time to get ready.


End file.
